I've made sacrifices for people and it feels like it was all in vain; I'm not expecting a reward, but I do want some gratitude for all the years I've invested. I should have focused more on myself, I should of been more selfish, and I should of turned a blind eye because it seems that they can do so easily toward me. I'm sick and tired of being in a situation where you're damned with either choice you make (hence the saying damned if you do damned if you don't). Sometimes these feelings I have become unbearable and I don't know what to do... I have no one to turn too... I can see why some people opt the easy way out; it all just seems or feels pointless when you have nothing or no one to fight for, believe in, and or love. I've been reaching out trying to find whatever it is, but I keep falling short and I just end up feeling even more lost than I originally was. Perhaps it's just me and maybe I'm just in a mental state where I'm just inflicting self pain inside and out or in other words I'm crumbling. Anyway that's all for now before I make less sense of trying to explain how I feel.
Pretending to be happy is a lot harder to pull off than pretending to be sober.